WHAT IS THE MOST INTIMATE ACT?

For me, it’s oral sex – sitting on a guy’s face. I wanted to say something more profound and deep – chatting all night, sharing my deepest secrets; nursing a lover back to health. But the minute I typed the question, the thought rummaged past my wondering desire to drink decaf coffee. Up close to someone’s ‘private parts’ – it’s surely a contender for the most intimate act – at least physical?

One person is in control; it’s a selfless thing to do in a vulnerable position. With sex, you’re both hopefully experiencing pleasure, swerving between how you feel and what they’re doing. Watching a person put aside their own needs to sexually fulfil you however – that’s such an open, power play.

  • A true act of intimacy must be when silence can linger. That’s why I’m not particularly fond of first dates at restaurants. Between glancing at menus, waiting for food and actually eating (the worst is listening to bread being crunched), it’s like you have to comprise 100 questions to keep chat going. If you can sit and walk with someone and not say a word – you’ll know your bond is close. More so if you stare at one another’s eyes.

Do we agree?? What’s your thoughts on intimacy ? Your favourite intimate act?

Get involved –

Tips On Giving A Good Blow Job.

So as you all enjoyed my piece on giving your girlfriend the best head, I though I would try this…. Tips on giving a good blow job. I had some very interesting and positive feedback, I thought you guys would love this! Plus I’m one of those girls – you can talk to about most things.

I decided to write my tips of the trade down. You may even learn a trick or two! 

Here are my 5 tips on giving better blow jobs:

1 – PLENTY OF LUBRICATION 

One trick I have learned is that deep-throating the beautiful cock will often produce a certain amount of saliva in your mouth – the perfect trick for when you are starting to run dry. You do need to learn to control your gag reflex, of course, but once you’ve got that mastered, everything else will be a breeze. Once you’ve got plenty of juices flowing in your own mouth, let rip. Be sloppy. I haven’t met a guy yet that doesn’t like a sloppy blowjob. I’m not talking bad sloppy; I’m talking well-lubricated.

2 – MAKE SOME NOISE

The good thing to come from all of that extra lubrication is the noise-factor. “There is nothing more satisfying than the sound of a woman slurping on your dick.” This was a statement actually said to me by another male friend, and no; I’ve not sexually molested that one.

Noise doesn’t need to come from the slurping alone. Make gag noises when you duck further down onto his cock than you would like. It makes them feel like a real man – as though their dick is too big for you to handle. I don’t mean actually wretch and heave onto his manhood, but having the odd little gagging sound will go down a treat. When you combine this with a nice groan every once in a while, it sounds like you are getting into it just as much as they are.

Enthusiasm is key here, guys and girls. And remember guys, when you compliment her on the stuff she does well, she’ll do it again!  

5 Tips on Giving Better Blowjobs

3 – DON’T BE AFRAID TO LOOK RIGHT UP INTO HIS EYES

Now I’m not suggesting that you start pulling some freaky stalker-style staring with the third tip on giving better blowjobs, but when you are on your knees and your eyes are looking right at up him like a puppy, do you know what your man will see? The eyes of an angel performing the blowjob of all blowjobs. They like it. Nearly every man I’ve ever spoken to about this has said that not enough eye-contact is one of their biggest downers.

One thing I have learned in all my years of giving head is that guys don’t like it when you stare at them for too long, so try fleeting glances. They are trying to concentrate in much the same way as most girls need to concentrate… Just imagine how uncomfortable you would feel if someone were staring up at you while they eat you out.

4 – DON’T FORGET ABOUT THE BALLS

These poor little dudes often get left out and honestly, playing with his little chaps will be doing YOU a favour if you are smart about it. You know when your arm starts to hurt, and your mouth starts to get lockjaw? Rather than stopping altogether, give yourself a break and start to play with the balls instead. He’ll probably appreciate the change of pace, and it will look as if you are putting a proper effort into things, paying particular attention to all the places everyone else usually leaves out. You don’t even need to play with them for very long – I usually find popping them in my mouth and spending a couple of minutes attention on them normally does the trick, and by that point, all my aches and pains will have gone away! 

5 – DON’T BE AFRAID TO GET RIGHT INTO IT

He’s not going to care whether or not you are pulling a weird face because your mouth has been stretched open by his massive, throbbing cock. Get involved – make some noise, use your hands as well as your mouth, let your tongue do some of the work and, above all else, look as if you are enjoying it. Play with yourself at the same time if you really want to take things that one step further, and you could even consider just sitting on his face. I tend to use this idea when I’m feeling pretty lazy. I can’t be expected to give his package the full attention when he is working me so beautifully from beneath, right?

Plus you’ll look and feel like a porn star! 

Those are the five things that I would recommend you work into your next blowjob. what’s the point in doing it if you aren’t going to get REALLY into it? If you’re not going to enjoy it, or at least pretend to, I personally guarantee that he’s not going to have all that much fun! And neither will you 45 minutes later when you’re starting to go stiff and he still hasn’t cum!

Intimacy, But Not Sex… But An Orgasm

So it’s been a while and so much has happened, I have recently got into a relationship with someone new… YES I know… I am shocked too. I have been so busy with work and odd little bits but I am back. ……….

So many women complain that so many men don’t know how to do it, so either I’ve been super lucky with the men I’ve chosen to let into my underwear or I have some sort of radar that ensures I only go to bed with men who have great oral skills. Because, let me tell you, I have had many, many orgasms from a good ol’ session of oral sex. I figured that would give me plenty of experience when it comes to conveying what I like.

When you give a girl head, it needs to be about the entire experience. You can’t just dive south, head for her cunt and hope everything works as you want it to. A womans body works pretty well because they know what to do with it, but not even I can muster up an orgasm when the captain of my ship doesn’t have the right technique.

At the same time, I don’t really need an actual technique. A steady, lapping rhythm will often get me there eventually, and so will small circles made with the tip of your tongue around my clit, but a combination of these, mixed in with some clever finger-action and a bit of experimentation, and you’ll turn things from orgasm to O-O-O-O-ORGASM! And isn’t that just what you want to do?

THIS IS HOW TO GIVE YOUR GIRLFRIEND THE BEST HEAD OF HER LIFE..

So you should start by kissing the neck. That’ll make goosebumps erupt across her body so you’ll feel her excitement as you run your fingers up and down the raised and bumpy skin on her arms. Whisper the naughty little things you want to do to her in her ear, and let your breath tickle the hairs on the back of her neck. And then, when it’s very evident what your intentions are, place your hand on the base of her back and lead her to the bedroom. It’s a dominant, yet gentle move, all in one.

When you get to the bedroom, undress her slowly. Kiss her as you do so, passionately, intensely, deeply. Take a moment to dip your head and twirl your tongue around the nipple you’ll playfully release from her bra. The right tweaks and touches will leave her wetter than you could ever imagine.

Position her where you want her on the bed, wherever it’s easy and comfortable for you, and kiss your way down her stomach as you take off whatever clothes she is still wearing. Admire her, look at her, take in what you have in front of you. Make her believe you’re hungry for it. Kiss and bite at her flesh and use your hands to grasp and grab handfuls of it on her hips and her thighs. Bite her hip bones, really bite them. Leave a mark. Be dominant. She will want to know that you’re desperate to devour her, every single little part of her, all of the womanly flesh.

The more impatient you make her, the quicker it’ll be for you to make her come — and the more toe-curling it’ll be for her. Glide your hands all over her body as you get close enough to her clit for her to feel your breath, but far enough away that she whimpers a little with desperate wanting. Reach up to play with her nipples, pinch them, twist them a little, be rougher than you like with them. She likes it .

TAKE YOUR TIME WHEN YOU FINALLY GET THERE.

Make her work for it. Tease her. Play with her. Kiss and bite at her stomach, nibble and lick at her thighs, caress around her labia. Her lips are far more sensitive than most people give them credit for, and a slightly painful tug can leave her gushing all over your hand. If you bite and suck on them before, during, and after she will come, and love you forever for it. Oh, and don’t forget the kissing. Kiss her everywhere. Kiss her more.

YOUR ACTUAL ORAL TECHNIQUE ITSELF ISN’T OVERLY IMPORTANT.

Getting that rhythm right might seem like a big deal, but it’s not. Not to her. Her body is fairly easy to read and interpret. Her moans and groans will let you know when you’re doing things right and hitting the perfect spot, and if she is not squirming or squiggling because of your capable hands and mouth, try something else — switch it up. That’s the trick: experiment, try different things, don’t stick to what you know. Think outside the box. She will want you to find all of those spots she really likes … and then some she is not aware of yet.

Sooo, Push your fingers inside her as you’re licking her, one finger to start with. Arch it up, heading towards the top of her pelvis from within, and stroke that little fleshy section. It’s like rubbing the Genie’s lamp; magic things will happen if you do. Do it at the same time as drawing circles around her clit with your tongue and you’ll make her come in no time at all. You can speed things up by playing with her nipples.

IF YOU’RE DOING IT RIGHT, YOU’LL START TO NOTICE A CHANGE IN HER BREATHING.

She will get louder and more ragged as that oh-so-fabulous O gets closer. Her hands will start to grasp at the sheets, at your hair, at everything and anything within reach. Her hips will start to move, swaying and bucking, trying to match the motion of your relentless tongue.

Use your tongue and drag it up and down the entirety of her pussy. Lick her ass too, if you like that kind of thing.

Just play with her. I can’t express that enough. Just play with her. Play with all of her. Use your hands to explore, squeeze and grab her body. Feel free to let your mouth go wild. Leave little bite marks on the insides of her thighs from where you get a little too carried away and bruises from grasping too hard. She will want to know that you want her, that you really want her, that her pussy is the only thing you want to be eating.

WHEN YOU THINK SHE IS GETTING CLOSE, BE PREPARED TO HOLD ON TIGHT.

If you continue to use your fingers inside her, maybe even adding a second digit to the mix, you’ll probably make her gush as you keep lapping at her clit. You’ll know when it’s coming because her back will arch. All of a sudden, she won’t be able to breathe. Her legs will start to violently shake. You’ll feel a flooding in your mouth — a very positive sign that you have done a very good job. And she will not want you to stop.

The bucking motion of her hips will start to slow down and as this happens, she will want you to slowly and lightly lick her clean. All the mess you just made, I want you to clean it up, softly, deliberately, carefully.. You just did that to her: the leg shaking and the hand-grasping and everything else that comes with making her come, so you should be smiling.

You need to be careful, though — careful and gentle. She will be super sensitive afterward and too much pressure anywhere near her pussy, especially her clit, will drive her insane. It’ll become too much. Too sensitive. No longer enjoyable.

BUT THEN SHE WILL WANT YOU TO HOLD HER.

She will want you to wrap your big arms around her and hold her close. Right there, at that moment, she bared her heart and soul to you. You had everything she had to offer. You had her entire body in your hands, doing the most intimate thing you can do to her, and she let you have it, all of it – the big bang.

But that’s how you give your girl the best head of her life. I hope I’ve given you enough tricks and tips to blow your partner’s mind. Don’t forget to come back and let me know either way! 

What’s the big deal with porn?

What’s the big deal with porn? My (female) friend was telling me that she’d found all this ‘weird’ porn on her boyfriend’s phone, and she wasn’t sure what to do about it.

Firstly, who gets that upset about porn?

Secondly, when did porn become such a bad thing?

Thirdly, what the hell does ‘weird’ porn mean? I know what’s weird to me, but I wouldn’t imagine we (my relatively clean-cut female friend and I) have the same boundaries when it comes to porn … and sex for that matter.

Right okay, so it’s not weird porn that’s the problem here. It’s the fact that he’s actually watching porn. I didn’t realise women still got upset about that kind of thing … Isn’t porn so mainstream nowadays?

I gave it some thought, but that just opened up more questions than answers. I love porn. Just like most people I have my own personal preferences, and I wouldn’t exactly say I hide that kind of information from anyone. I’m not ashamed to watch porn.

I also think watching porn with your partner helps your sex life in the bedroom. Does that make me weird then? If I were to find porn on my partner’s phone, I wouldn’t get upset. I’d have a look through it and see what kind of thing he liked to watch, what gets him off in those moments where he thinks no one can find out.  I find it quite hot. 

Porn does have it’s negatives, I understand that. It gives people unrealistic ideas of what sex is like,  what the body is really like, blah blah blah. But it can be a good thing too, can’t it? I like to think I’ve learned a few tricks over the years from watching porn, and I’ve definitely tried new things on my own body because of something I saw in a blue movie once. I’m not embarrassed about it, it’s completely normal. People can judge, but I can guarantee their history has some porn in it.

So here’s the advice I *wish* I’d given to my friend but didn’t because I’m diplomatic and supportive and just listened and mmhmmm’d in the appropriate places instead:

Girl, get over yourself. He’s a guy, he has hormones, sometimes he wants to have a wank. It has no bearing on you, or how much he wants you. He can have a wank in the morning and still want to bed you that afternoon or night, or even ten minutes later. He can jerk off to other women on a TV screen and not be cheating on you. He can think about having sex with those women while he’s pumping his hand up and down because he’s not touching them. He’s jerking off, that’s it. What would you rather he did? Fucked someone else? I know you want to be the ONLY thing he’s thinking about while he’s yanking his chain, but come on.

I want Jared Leto as the Joker to come in one night, tie me to the bed and do unspeakable things to me, but it’s not cheating on your other half. It’s definitely not grounds for tears.

I believe that you need to pick your battles in life. Porn is not a battle you should fight, because it’s not one you will ever win. If you ban him from watching porn, he’ll watch it behind your back. He’ll find a way to watch it, even if it means deleting his history in future. He’ll just be more careful. He’ll take extra measures to make sure you don’t find out and at that point, he’s actually being deceitful and lying to you. That’s opening up a brand new can of worms.

Each to their own, I get that, but you can’t stop a man watching porn. Why would you even want to? It’s really not that big a deal.